matt has been a bit distant lately. I was worried about it, but he swears it’s just him being introverted. Of course my idiot brain went into ‘what if’ mode tonight. But then my gut calmed me down and I realized something. If he’s half the guy I think he is, he’s worth the heartbreak if I’m wrong. And the truth reveals all. I genuinely feel like he cares deeply about me, but he is definitely still hiding something. He has revealed a lot, though. When he’s comfortable he will tell me. Or it will make itself known eventually. My heart still soars when I think of him, so hopefully I can get my brain to calm down.
I need to learn to trust people again. I’m going to start with him. I realized in the shower that I haven’t had my gut trust anyone since justin, and it’s been right. So, I need my brain to calm down and let me follow my gut.